Day 2: Working in the Wilderness
THE STORY OF JACOB
Genesis 29:13-30
By Kristin Scott
By Kristin Scott
Jacob was a man with a plan. To him it seemed like a fool-proof one, until of course, it wasn’t. Can you imagine the level of fury and disappointment Jacob would have felt? To have your plans and desires ruined with such a cruel plot twist? Dashed hopes and expectations to this magnitude certainly would have sent him into a personal wilderness while he was forced to work for an additional seven years to earn the bride he was seeking.
Like Jacob, I’m a planner. After working as a stay-at-home mom for seven years I had a grand plan to return to my teaching career and insert a deeper sense of purpose back into my life. I was starting conversations with my husband about this desire when he suddenly lost his job. My return to work quickly became the immediate plan, not the pace I was expecting it to be. Yet, after months of interviews, the job I ended up being offered was a long-term sub position. This was not the plan I had in mind or, quite frankly, felt like I had deserved after working diligently for so many years at home. I struggled in that wilderness season to show up to work with the right attitude and perspective. I couldn’t understand why my plan had failed, nor was I able to reconcile that I had been given second best. A song that I discovered during that year of wilderness laboring provided words that I clung to: “Even when I don’t understand, I will choose to trust you, God.” These words kept my soul from floundering and getting lost in the disappointment of unmet expectations. I had to learn to trust God even when things didn’t make sense or go my way.
After one week Jacob got Rachel, and after one year I officially got the job. However, three years later I voluntarily walked away from teaching to pursue ministry, which I discovered held the true sense of purpose I had been longing for. The pathway and plan that I thought would lead to my deepest desires ended up being something unexpected, and nothing I could have planned. God is working in the details of our stories, and even uses what seem like mishaps to bring his “unexpected” plans about.
When we work through disappointing wilderness seasons, trusting more in God’s purposes and focusing less on our own disillusionment, we may discover that God is up to something even greater than our own plans. Where in your story is God inviting you to deeper trust?
PRAY:
God, even when I don’t understand your plan, I choose to trust you. Help my heart to not lose sight of your everlasting love and faithfulness within my story. Amen.
Like Jacob, I’m a planner. After working as a stay-at-home mom for seven years I had a grand plan to return to my teaching career and insert a deeper sense of purpose back into my life. I was starting conversations with my husband about this desire when he suddenly lost his job. My return to work quickly became the immediate plan, not the pace I was expecting it to be. Yet, after months of interviews, the job I ended up being offered was a long-term sub position. This was not the plan I had in mind or, quite frankly, felt like I had deserved after working diligently for so many years at home. I struggled in that wilderness season to show up to work with the right attitude and perspective. I couldn’t understand why my plan had failed, nor was I able to reconcile that I had been given second best. A song that I discovered during that year of wilderness laboring provided words that I clung to: “Even when I don’t understand, I will choose to trust you, God.” These words kept my soul from floundering and getting lost in the disappointment of unmet expectations. I had to learn to trust God even when things didn’t make sense or go my way.
After one week Jacob got Rachel, and after one year I officially got the job. However, three years later I voluntarily walked away from teaching to pursue ministry, which I discovered held the true sense of purpose I had been longing for. The pathway and plan that I thought would lead to my deepest desires ended up being something unexpected, and nothing I could have planned. God is working in the details of our stories, and even uses what seem like mishaps to bring his “unexpected” plans about.
When we work through disappointing wilderness seasons, trusting more in God’s purposes and focusing less on our own disillusionment, we may discover that God is up to something even greater than our own plans. Where in your story is God inviting you to deeper trust?
PRAY:
God, even when I don’t understand your plan, I choose to trust you. Help my heart to not lose sight of your everlasting love and faithfulness within my story. Amen.
Posted in 21 Days of Prayer and Fasting
6 Comments
Thank you for sharing your theoughts! I find it so hard to put myself in Jacob’s shoes especially how far we’ve come that I couldn’t imagine doing marriage in this way (beyond thankful for that). I will say that Jacob demonstrates perseverance in a way that is so determined. How can I foster determination of perseverance in God’s plan, especially when my plan goes sideways or I find myself in a chapter of life that disappoints my expectations. “God, I surrender my expectations to you and give you my determination and perseverance.”
Love your prayer, Mark. You're right...it's cool to see this character trait in Jacob even when he is forced to pivot.
I have definitely lost sight of Gods love and faithfulness in my story. Everything has been very lack luster and grey. At this point showing up to work feels like the only place left the where people look for me to show up. The only place where me being there has an impact. To say the season has had its disappointments feels like a gross understatement. It’s challenging to make any progress to move passed it and see God
Raven, I'm sorry to hear that this season has felt so empty. I pray that you can recapture the beauty of God's love and faithfulness and carry it as a light to bust through the gray.
So so good. Thank you, Kristin. I also feel invited in a certain area to trust God more...thank you!
“..,trusting more in God’s purposes and focusing less on our own disillusionment…” dang girl, yes! Call a spade a spade. Trading heavenly perspective for ground level perspective is straight up disillusionment.